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Business Spotlight March 14 - "Women at
Work".
'The Myth of the Bitch'
S. Hite
Even today, there are clichés about powerful women, but few real models of
women who hold positions of authority. It's no wonder that women might be a
tad self-conscious in executive positions, with the eyes of the world on
them (other women, and men, of course), just waiting to be critical and find
an excuse to say they can't do it, can't handle it.
Most women are not used to having authority over men, except perhaps over a
brother when younger, or over their own children - after a fashion!
Sometimes, women feel no one respects their authority. One woman says:
"I'm at the same level as a guy who works with me, Tony. But the
secretaries all queue up to him, open doors and refer clients to him. To me,
they act like I'm one of them."
Many women in authority have mixed feelings about their relationship to
other women working in the firm. A woman boss says: "How do I relate to my
receptionists? I feel very uncomfortable with them. I don't want to be
considered 'arrogant' or look like a 'dominating woman', so I always smile and
say
hello. But sometimes they can be arrogant or dismissive with me, or 'forget'
to do things I say, things they don't forget to do for the male executives.
I try to smile and act nonchalant in these situations."
To manage men, what do women need to know? The typical clichés men have about
women (we all know them if we are brutally honest) are: "Women get in the
way at work"; "Women never stop talking, especially whinging";
"Women love to sit around varnishing their nails"; "Women get
moody at certain times of the month (and turn into terrible monsters)";
"Women go shopping every lunch hour and spend fortunes."
Once you know and face the stereotypes, you can laugh them off, knowing they
are only hot air and not a realistic assessment of you or your job
performance.
Women in charge or with careers are often depicted by the media as power-mad
monsters. Think of the cartoons of Margaret Thatcher, or feminist leaders,
as screaming ogres and tyrants who nobody would want to be around. Or more
recently, women are shown in films like Disclosure (Enthüllung) as sexy,
seductive predators who are slick, but "sick".
This is not the reality! The problem is that women are faced with these
stereotyped attitudes in such a way that they are almost forced to bend over
backwards to disprove them. The tendency for women is to fall into one of
two categories: to become either too official and hard, or abnormally
"nice", calm and reasonable. The stereotypes are so shrill that often
they
block real working relationships between men and women.
Listen to your own real experiences, not to ancient hearsay. Women can be
wonderful colleagues, bosses and subordinates - or terrible ones, just as
men can.
What style of management should a woman have? A woman, like a man, should
opt for whatever style she feels suits her best.
Does a woman have the right to "take power"?
Yes.
FOOTNOTE Dr Shere Hite is the director of Hite Research International, a
consultancy specializing in sexual ethics in the workplace. Her latest book is
Sex & Business (Financial Times/Prentice Hall, ISBN1-273-64198-0, £19.99).
Internet site: www.sexandbusiness.com
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